This Must Be The Place

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“The world is a book and those who do not travel, read only one page” – St Augustine

You know this is what I did when I took a break from the daily grind last summer. I wrote and wrote, and wrote. Here, I am sharing a few excerpts from my last summer’s diary entries, circa 2018:

I was lying down on warm sand, somewhere on the coast of hope, dreams and wild imaginations. Salty breeze was caressing my bare back and I was fervently pouring down my thoughts on the crisp white pages of an orange cover diary, which was a farewell gift from a very dear friend who lived in Cairo, Egypt…..

It was Kishore Da (I am a self confessed Bollywood freak) who sang, “Musafir hoon yaaron….” (I am a traveller, friends…) and it was Anais Nin who said, “We travel, some of us forever, to see other states, other lives, other souls”. In my solitude, as I set out to discover the unknown of late, never has this felt more true.

Lately my soul mate/my love (let’s call him L from now onwards) has been coming home from his work and saying to me, ” Vib, let’s sell everything, we will get a good exchange rate, currently Aussie dollar is even bigger than the US dollar and let’s go to India. I will grow a beard and leave our son with nana nani (my parents) for a while and….you and me – lets go backpacking around India. I want to write Vib, I want to write. I wanna work in the slums of India, some social work, some community development work. Enough of this high flying, jet-setting, high-pressure, ministers galore lifestyle. I wanna break free, do something drastic. Lets have a seachange. I wanna add some meaning to this life – something beyond this meaningless existence of consumerism, daily grind, rat race etc”.

Always known L as a bit of an eccentric, oddball, highly principled, strong and scary type but then the thought of giving it all up does scare me a bit, especially when you have a kid. But then life’s never been boring with my Scorpion L, he has always given me the flights of my life – I trust him with my life. When I met him, he was this young writer, a philosophy graduate who was just so different from the rest of the crowd and that’s why I fell head over heels in love with him and married him. But the big question is….Do I have the courage to give it all up and go for the unknown with my man? My heart says ‘yes’, I have always followed my heart and it has hardly ever gone wrong. After all, life is always best played without a script – always been my motto. So I say to my man, “yes, let’s do it!”

Are we destined to be nomads for life? Constantly seduced by what is unattainable, mysterious and exotic in our minds? It’s an exciting thought but scary too. Our dreams often say more about us than we would ever like anyone to know.

I am sure you will agree with me when I say that sometimes, at least a few times, in our dreams and in our imaginations, we have all tried to explore new paths, a new city, a new love, a new everything, even a new ‘us’, a totally new life….to some extent. We have all spun fantasies and have tried to live them up, despite not knowing our directions or even our end destinations at all. We are people who when fear of the unknown stare us in the face, we look back at it boldly with wide eyes and ask, “could you be any more fascinating?”

LESSONS LEARNT: When you move away you can be yourself, you can be someone else, you can be who you want to be. In that desire to be unmasked comes a certain sense of freedom.

This is the great power of any journey. When elsewhere becomes here. When we are forced to navigate for ourselves. When we are forced to feel alive and our senses are heightened. When our dreams come close to reality and we feel happy, fulfilled, challenged, confused, dazed, peaceful, restless, euphoric, ecstatic….all at once.

May the dream never end.

I dedicate this with love and respect to us all – to the wanderers and the searchers in us all. We are not there yet but almost…. which is of course each and everyone of us.

PS: I love the brightness, the boldness, the newness of no fixed plan and an itinerary that is loose at best. Destinations unknown, people unmet, places unseen. Play the great explorer; take off and touch down. Go on friends, live a little…

Let’s get lost!!!
~ The Gypsy Girl Vibs

 

Perfectly Imperfect

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There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in – Leonard Cohen

What would you do if you are given a piece of blank canvas, paintbrush and some colours? Would you just keep it blank or would you draw some lines, sketches or would you paint it wildly and make it a painting, a piece of art, your own version of a Masterpiece? The choice is all yours. We all have one life but how we live it, what we do with it, is always our own decision, our choice. We can make our life a piece of art or just live a life which is very mundane, colourless and resembles a blank canvas. Of course, there are many contributing factors how our life turns out to be, such as cultural, geographical, environmental, and the opportunities we are provided with in our lifetime. However, we can make art even from scrapes. We can collect all the bits and pieces of our unique life experiences and create something beautiful out of them.

How would you define art? Does it bring you joy and happiness? Do you try your best to make it as perfect and as orderly as you can to make it a perfect piece of art? Is perfection an important ingredient of a perfect piece of art or art is imperfect? Have you ever wondered if imperfection and spontaneity can create a beautiful piece of art?

Since our childhood, we come across constant messages of perfection, excellence and brilliance. We are told that any flaws, cracks or defects are undesirable and should be avoided and rejected at all costs. All the various religions and the philosophies of this world talk about how to live your life and how to reach that near perfect stage as a human being on this planet. Anything or anyone short of being ‘perfect’ is seen as a failure. We have all come across perfectionists during our lifetime. We all have at least one perfectionist in our family. Perfectionists seek perfection in everything they do. It is great to be a perfectionist but then life teaches you that life is not perfect.

Our modern day society is obsessed with perfection, perfection in all spheres of life. Perfection is sought at any cost. We as a society want to be physically perfect, we spend billions of dollars on our visual image. We torture ourselves to be without any blemish, without any scars, without any flaws. The cities are awash with humungous billboards promoting flawless, blemish free, prefect models. We want to live in perfect houses with perfect furnishings, perfect cars, perfect vacations, perfect kids, perfect pets, perfect jobs, and perfect everything. These days you can even have a perfect death, you can buy a designer coffin bag for yourself with a hefty price tag – there you go – perfect in life, perfect in death! You could be the epitome of perfection, with money you can achieve perfection more or less. The only pitfall with money is, it doesn’t guarantee you inner peace, contentment or happiness. It is all superficial and soul destroying.

One day, when I was juggling with this ‘perfection vs imperfection’ thoughts, I came across the Japanese philosophy of ‘Wabi-Sabi’. It emerged as an antidote and reaction to the dominant extravagant and luxurious ways of living in the 15th century Japan. It is defined as the Japanese art of imperfect beauty. It is the art of finding beauty in imperfection, in all things imperfect – living or non-living. It is about accepting the natural cycle of growth, decay and death. It is uncluttered, slow and simple. It celebrates life in all its natural stages. It worships cracks, scars, crevices, marks, so called unsightly spots of all kinds and accepts them whole heartedly and finds beauty in them. In today’s world of perfection, it is a breath of fresh air. It is everything that the dominant modern culture is not.
Wab–Sabi values simplicity, modesty and authenticity with an acceptance of the old, of the worn out, and of the asymmetrical. In wabi sabi, you understand and embrace the idea that nothing in this world is permanent, perfect, or complete. It also emphasizes the fact that life hardly ever works out the way we plan it.

Wabi-Sabi is soothing and calming. It is a serene philosophy of acceptance. It teaches us to accept the natural cycle of life. It teaches us to accept the natural process of aging and different stages of life with grace and gratitude. In a nutshell, ‘Wabi’ basically focuses on elegance which is understated and simplicity which is rustic. It encourages practicing of minimalism. And when you derive pleasure in the imperfections, it is called ‘Sabi’. Wabi-Sabi has a deep understanding of the transient and fleeting nature of this life. It teaches us to embrace the fragility of life and how to love life in all its shades. It teaches us to respect the mark of time and weather. It trains our eyes, heart and soul to seek beauty in unexpected places. You start seeing beauty in melancholy, solitude, in an old men’s toothless smile, in an old woman’s grey hair, in fading autumn leaves, in a broken earthen pot, in an uneven drift wood, in the pages of an old book, in the wrinkles of an old man’s forehead, in the rawness of emotions…..and many such so called ‘imperfect’ things.

Our fast paced and perfect modern lives often lead to stress, anxiety, depression, sadness, loneliness and other mental health issues. Wabi-Sabi can help us in slowing down and to find meaning and fulfilment beyond materialism. It can assist us in deriving joy from the imperfections around us. It also encourages us to practice mindfulness and to count our blessings and to celebrate each moment of our life.

There are seven aesthetic principles for achieving Wabi-Sabi: tranquility, freedom, subtle grace, naturalness, asymmetry/irregularity, simplicity and understated beauty. The art of kintsugi is an excellent example of Wabi-Sabi. In this art form, a cracked pottery is filled with gold dusted lacquer to highlight the aging beauty and damage rather than trying to hide them. The fault is always highlighted and featured. Wabi-Sabi perpetuates the belief that imperfections are essential for a full appreciation of the broken object and this transitory and ever-changing world.
The art of Wabi-Sabi doesn’t require wealth, specialised training, special skills, special abilities or talents. Wabi-Sabi is about acceptance and appreciation of what you already have including all your imperfections. It’s about loving yourself as you are. Wabi-Sabi makes you a ‘perfect’ all accepting, patient, kind, resilient and a beautiful ‘Artist’ of this imperfect world. It allows you to be yourself. You understand and learn how delightfully liberating and joyous it is to fall in love with yourself – imperfections, scars, flaws and all. You realize how beautiful it is to be totally and perfectly ‘Imperfect!’ Imperfection is beautiful becomes your mantra.

What Will Your Verse Be?

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“No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world…… And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for. That you are here; that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse, what will your verse be?

Robbin Williams, Dead Poets Society